Every parent
and caregiver has their own philosophies about a child’s needs. So
how can you effectively your ideas with your child’s caregiver? If
your child is in a daycare, preschool or other type of formal
setting there is information that they are required to follow the
rules and regulations by their governing agency.
For example
they may be required to have a nap when your home is a nap free
zone. If your child is engaged in this type of care familiarize
yourself with the policies of the program so that you will be able
to work with it in its confines. If your child’s daycare is
required to host a nap and you aren’t thrilled with the idea ask how
you can work around it.
You may find
out that the problem can be solved very easily with a variety of
possible solutions. Maybe this could be a rest time for your child
and she could be allowed a picture book instead of being encouraged
to sleep. Maybe you can get rid of your child’s nap time altogether
sometimes all it takes is a modified plan for a change to occur.
If your child
is in a home day care setting, or cared for by a family member or a
nanny in theory you should have complete say in what your child does
and when but in these types of child care arrangements, emotions
often run high. When dealing with a small home group or individual
child care provider it’s not so much what you say but how you say
that will cause your point to be heard and accepted.
A winning
conversation with your child’s caregiver may go something like
this: “I know you love Stacie dearly and I’m so thankful that you
provide such great care for her. John and I have been thinking and
we decided that we prefer she only nap in the afternoon because we
feel that is the best schedule for her and our family. To make sure
that it’s not extra work for you each morning we will leave a
picture book for Stacie to read during the 30 minute rest time. She
has to be quiet and rest in her room but doesn’t have to sleep.
Feel free to come up with some other quiet time ideas of your own
and we can try them out. We are excited that you are on board with
us to always give Stacie what’s best.”
In all child
care situations when voicing concerns the following tips always make
it a bit easier for the provider to swallow. Use the positive,
negative, positive constructive criticism approach; make the care
giver part of the solution instead of part of the problem, listen to
the feelings of your caregiver while remaining calm and standing
firm in your ground, making it about you and your choices not the
providers – I feel, we prefer, our family thinks instead of your
ways, your ideas, your thoughts on this – these go a long way in
breaking down the defensive walls.
I’m Michelle
LaRowe author of Nanny to the Rescue for Baby Talk Radio. Be sure
to visit my website at
http://www.michellelarowe.com for your parenting tip of the day.
